How to categorize a gravestone when the ashes were scattered?

+10 votes
286 views

Juanita Huntley Watts, has a gravestone in Endicott Cemetery, Endicott, WA, Find A Grave #73736027. Yet, her ashes were scattered. She is now categorized as buried there. This situation isn't addressed in Category:Cremation.  

Should she be recategorized? If so, how?

This has some broader implications, since, in many cases, those who died at sea or in distant or foreign lands may also have cemetery gravestones, even empty caskets to accompany them.

WikiTree profile: Juanita Watts
in WikiTree Help by Susan Anderson G2G6 Pilot (133k points)
My mother was cremated and I personally scattered her ashes. I was shocked that within fifteen days of her death she suddenly had a memorial at Find A Grave under the Cemetery attached to the funeral home where she was cremated. I demanded that Find A Grave take it down. It took them some while but they eventually did.

**Holy ___! I just checked and someone else has created a new one.**
I've heard about this sort of thing happening.  I'm so sorry to hear it happened to you!  It's good they took it down - shocking that someone recreated it!  Have you considered insisting that they turn it over to you? Then you could head off further attacks of memorial-creators and put an explanation on the Memorial page.  Whatever you do, I hope it goes through with a minimum of hassle for you this time.

The situation isn't the same for me.  This is my grandmother, but the gravestone/monument/cenotaph/whatever is indeed there.  I've asked to have the Memorial transferred to my custody.
Oh Nancy!  I am so sorry about to hear that.   I wish you a very quick resolution to this very personal concern.
I'm so sorry Nancy. How very frustrating.

2 Answers

+8 votes

I suggest the category "https://www.wikitree.com/wiki/Category:Monuments_and_Memorials".

Note the comment in red "Note: A monument that also houses human remains should be categorized as a cemetery as well as a monument or memorial."
The memorial can be identified as being located in Endicott Cemetery.

by Steve Thomas G2G6 Pilot (156k points)

Thank you very much, Steve.  This would seem appropriate, but ...

This is a high-level category, with a warning notice: "This is a high level category. Please do not add individual profiles. Add profiles to the narrowest category possible."

When I went down a notch, into the United States sub-category, the monuments there were for battles and groups of people and the like. And, again, it's a high level category, complete with the same warning. This doesn't seem appropriate for one, small engraved stone in a local cemetery, which otherwise doesn't cater to memorials.

Do you have a suggestion for how a sub-sub category might be set up to allow for individual - not group - cases such as this one?  I absolutely don't want to run afoul of how the Cemeterists are trying to organize their categories.

My main point was to distinguish between the headstone on a grave and a memorial plaque. Both can be located in a cemetery.
 

Someone from the Cemeterist Project will probably give a better answer.
Understood.  I'll hope that someone from the project chimes in here with an answer they can accept.

Thank you so very much for taking the time to make your suggestion.  I have made note of the link you provided and will definitely keep it in mind as I tackle this problem.
Cheers. This is not a deeply personal issue to me but I can see parts of the conversation.
My mother had two sisters. One passed away who was cremated and her ashes were cast on the family farm.
Two years ago my father passed away and his ashes have been interred in a local cemetery. The living sisters have reserved a row for themselves, my father and a memorial plaque for my aunt.
+7 votes
There also many stone memorials in cemeteries for people whose actual gravesite can no longer be found. I deal with by referring to them as memorials, not tombstones or grave markers and make it clear that they are not marking an actual grave.
by Daniel Bly G2G6 Mach 9 (93.1k points)
Thank you, Daniel.  It's good to know someone else has been trying to cope with this situation.  How do you do the categories for them?

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