What message do you send to your DNA matches? New template.

Question

Hi WikiTreers,

If you've taken a Family Tree DNA Family Finder, AncestryDNA, or 23andMe test, check out your DNA tests page.

We just added a basic copy-and-paste template for sending messages to your test matches.

What do you think of it? How is it different from what you send?

I'd love to see examples of different initial contact messages, and what kind of responses people get. Maybe we can figure out what message gets the best response rate.

We can edit the message template and add what we learn to this help page: http://www.wikitree.com/wiki/DNA_Matches

Thanks!

Chris

P.S. Kitty (Cooper) Smith posted a message a few days outlining her overall approach to working with matches: "How do you use your auDNA test on WikiTree?" That's almost the same question as what I'm asking, so you could respond there as well. Her message is definitely worth reading either way.

Comments

I've not received my results 'yet' for my DNA test, so this may come in handy.  Thank you Chris.

Answer 1

My original test is on Ancestry.  It tells me where the [assumed] MCRA is. I initially message through Ancestry with the subject DNA Match and the surnames.  The body of my message is

I am currently researching this branch of my family and would love to coordinate with you as we have a DNA match at _____ ancestor(s).  Please feel free to reply to this message or email me at _______.

It gets better than a 50% response rate.  My second message is to see if they have a GEDMATCH ID.  If they they do not I have been walking people through GEDMATCH when they are willing to do so and then at least set up a basic profile on WikiTree and I give them a link to my profile.  With the GEDMATCH ID it has been easy to at least run a 1:1 search.

It's MUCH easier to have them look at that compact tree view - thank you! - for a surname they recognize.  With the surname and GEDMATCH IDs, I can manually build "towards" them, sourcing as I go for them to connect to and we will ultimately be able to create additional DNA triangulation I believe.

I have to take a far more basic approach as I don't have near the understanding of the DNA Kitty (Rockstar) Cooper Smith does so I'm not able to answer questions.  I simply direct people to her blog for answers when I am asked to try what things mean.

Elizabeth

Answer 2

Here is the type of form letter I send to three or more people I suspect are matching each other on the same autosomal DNA segment:

Hello Jane Doe, Mary Jones, and John Smith,

In Family Tree DNA's Family Finder, my maternal uncle William Dekle shares about a 7 cM segment on chromosome five with each of you from 123899115 to 132832117.  William Dekle's ancestry is at

http://www.wikitree.com/treewidget/Dekle-6/5

Please let me know if you share any of those ancestors or if you have ancestry from any of the same geographic places.

Thank you and sincerely, Peter

Peter J. Roberts

http://www.wikitree.com/wiki/Roberts-7085

>>>>>>>>>

If they reply then I invite them to add their ancestry and GEDmatch ID (if they have one) to to WikiTree.  I also offer to add their information (and their ancestry back to our shared ancestor) to WikiTree on their behalf.

Comments

I gave you an upvote Robert, though if I receive an invitation like that (and I have received a few since I got DNA tested), I do not know what it means. You did add my GEDmatch ID to WikITree. Apparently I have ancestors also from Ireland, though they have not yet materialized in WikiTree. I do not understand why one has to triangulate some times, and other times it is not neccesary. I have given quite a few people access to my DNA results, but still can't confirm with proven DNA that I'm indeed my parents child. I bet more than %50 percent of those WikiTreers who had themselves tested, struggle with this - comprehending the bigger picture.

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I overlooked that most of my e-mails to matches are people I identified through GEDmatch and I usually include everyone's GEDmatch ID.  Those IDs are really important.

I continue to be surprised at how often I get e-mails from people who simply say they match me (period).  I then reply that I'm the contact person for over 40 DNA kits and have to ask the name of the person they match, what type of test they took, IDs, etc.  It is really helpful to provide specific information as soon as possible (without drowning them with too much information -- some of which may not apply).

Sincerely, Peter

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Exactly, Peter. How many percentage of users that are actual matches who take the tests actually understand what the results mean (i.e. "they match me (period).").

I think rolling out the big guns with 'we share 7cm on chromosome such and such may lead some people thinking they are way in over their heads.

I don't mean to come across as saying anything negative here at all, so please don't misunderstand me. It's just my decades of experience in IT that users are a majority of the times confused -- in this case it could be purchasing a product over their heads, or simply not being guided to the tools to learn yet.

I think @ElizabethTownsend's answer is spot on - starting slowly, gentle, seeing where the user is at, providing guidance, and moving forward.

Best of luck! Jason

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Peter:

I too manage many tests and often get an Ancestry message with "I found X in your tree".... but don't tell me which one.  Or "we match" but don't tell me who they match with (again, manage many). And I try not to type back in all caps!  I usually put in my subject line to them - "Ancestry match to AHH, xxxx, et al.... Would like to connect"

Answer 3

Well, it's important to remember that some people may have several DNA tests floating around out there, so it's very important to be as specific as possible in your request.  Nobody wants to do the research FOR you, so you need to tell them exactly what you're looking for.

The following is copied/pasted DIRECTLY from a post made by Elizabeth Shown Mills on Facebook a few weeks ago:
"- Whose account do you match with--me or the 21 other accounts I administer under this same email address?
- Which kind of FTDNA test is showing the match? (atDNA, mtDNA, and Y-DNA tests all have separate match lists.)
- What's your own name or user name so I can check that match list to see if I can help you?
- What are your surnames of interest? Can you supply an Ahnentafel or point to an online tree that you have posted? Have you even checked the list of surnames I posted with my account?"

Post:  https://www.facebook.com/elizabeth.shownmills/posts/762780213853294

(She may or may not have restricted her audience, so if this link doesn't work, I apologize.  But I promise it came from her, and unfortunately, I can't really "Cite" it since it's a FB post.)

Comments

  Elizabeth Shown Mills is my genealogical spirit totem. She's an absolute treasure.

Answer 4

Here's an example of what I have sent to triangulated groups:

All of your are matching my dad (George Athey) and one another on a segment of chromosome 9.  Since everyone is sharing a segment, it means we all share a common ancestor.  I would like to work with you to try and determine that ancestor.

The following kit names on FTDNA match my dad and each other:  Robert William Hartman, Marilyn Worsham, Dennis P. Mathews, Patricia Ann Webb, Brigitt Deanne Kergan, Allison Marie Key.

These are all sizable segments that are being shared with my dad:  Hartman 39cM, Worsham 31.3cM, Mathews 21.7cM, Webb 44.6cM, Kergan 27.7cM, Key 28.5cM (who's also sharing a segment on chr. 4 with my dad).

Do you have a family tree I can look at?  You can view my dad's here:  http://www.wikitree.com/treewidget/Athey-68/5

Surnames include: Abbott, Athey, Bapst, Barnard, Barnes, Berry, Biggs, Bradford, Bunker, Burns, Casto, Coleman, Daminig, Dominick, Dominy, Dorminy, Estes, Estridge, Fallis, Fry/Frey/Frye, Fussell, Gorham, Hatcher, Jones, Kelly, Kirkland, Lamb, Leedom, Macy, Maurer, Miller/Mueller, Mowder, Odom, Pabst, Reulen, Rose, Rouse, Russell, Schuler, Simms, Snell, Stroud/Strowde/Strode, Thrift, Williams, Worth.

Hope that you're interested and that we can figure out our common ancestor.  Thanks!

I usually hear from at least 75% of the people.  Sometimes they tell me they don't understand, in which case I will go into more detail.  In the case of matches that are from Gedmatch, I list the Gedmatch ID # of the person that matches (since some people manage multiple kits).  If I have located a common ancestor with one of the people, I mention that person but point out that it could very well be a different ancestor.  If I have seen that numerous of the matches have ancestors in a specific state or states, I mention that also.

I've learned that keeping it pretty simple in the first email is the best way to go.  When I provide too much information, it seems to confuse a lot of people.  While I'm very 'into' DNA, my experience is that the bulk of the people have very little or no information about DNA, triangulated groups, or mapping chromosomes.  K.I.S.S. is very applicable in this situation!

Answer 5

I get about 90% response rates.   Each email will vary a bit depending on who I am matching with and which family I think it matches.  

I include URLs to my WikiTree profiles for someone that I think is in the match line.  

I include total CMS and longest segment data.

I also run a People Who Match 1 or 2 people from GEDmatch or the In Common from FTDNA and list those other IDs.   

I also include the chromosome views with SNP ranges to show if there is or is not triangulation present.  

I give a short explanation of what I did above and why.

What I find is that the majority of testers seem to have taken a test for ethnicity results and have no idea how to read the results they get or what to do with matches.  So I try to do some coaching in my initial contact.  I have had good success with this approach,

Answer 6

Thanks Chris! I sometimes don't reach out because I'm not sure how much to say. This helps.

Answer 7

I like to keep my messages simple, but enticing, so this is what I like to send:

Hi,  I am currently looking through my dna matches and I found you there.  We share 75cm which means we could possibly be 3^rd cousins.  I don’t know if you are interested in your ancestors and wish to build a family tree, but if you contact me by message or email, I can help to determine exactly how we relate and help you build your tree.