Could someone review this rewritten biography

Question

I've just finished rewriting this person imported from gedcom - Hurved-127 I would be grateful if someone could give it the once over and point out possible improvments before I start doing others in the same vein.

One annoyance I had was having to add <br> every time I wanted a newline (without a blank line) is there a better way of doing this.

Comments

In several instances you've used ordinal numbers, (abbreviated) like November 26th in a date.  Those are in general used to compare things and that is not the case here.  In general, punctuation is followed by a space, including colons and semi-colons.  There are several instances where this needs correcting.  Also the whole format looks like an Ancestry.com creation, but that would be a matter of choice I reckon.

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Thanks, I will try and improve punctuation but very easy to miss when editing a wiki. I dont really understand your point about dates, I think the way I have used them is perfectly valid in UK at least.

It is mainly based on Ancestry records but Im unaware of any other alternative format  to use as on wikitree I am mainly trying to provide evidence to backup existence of persons and their relationships. If you have examples of alternative formats I would be interested to see them.

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There is definitely a difference between  grammar conventions for dates used in Britain and those used in America. http://www.englishlessonsbrighton.co.uk/how-to-write-dates-british-american-english/

It is probably considered more correct to put the day before the month but in fact usage varies. It always has. The date on the front page of the Daily Mail reads 'Friday, May 6th 2016' It has apparently used this format since 1896 when it was founded. If you google images Charles Dickens' letters you'll see a variety of date formats. 

(on the profile there is an 'in' November 27th. I think that is a typo for on November 27th)

Answer 1

Paul, this looks fine. Your statements all have sources. The bio presents itself neatly and clearly.

Your Sources could use a little filling out. I realize that you've stated the Census place in the bio, but I also think it should be mentioned in the Census citation. Your other citations should also be more specific as to place. The death Citation is it a death certificate or an index or something else? There are examples on this page

As for <br>: I know <br> works but the Wikitree recommended is <br />. And I agree, it's a pain every time you want a line break. The other way to get a line break is to put : (colon) at the beginning of the sentence, but it also creates an indentation.

It's interesting about the name spelling changing with that generation, glad you included that tidbit.

Thank you.

Comments

Thanks, and good point about the colon, I converted to use this an its easier to read with the indentation anyway.