Question of the Week: What do you do when you find a "black sheep?"

Question

When you come across a black sheep, murderer, slave owner, thief, or any array of troublemakers, how do you present them in your tree? Do you hide them, avoid them, or are you glad you have something unusual to share?

Comments

http://ibssg.org/blacksheep/ <-- cousin told me about this! :)

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depends on whether I am doing genealogy or playing minecraft (with the kids, of course)

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We could never find my great grandfather William Henry Tyner (Tyner-158) in the 1860 cenus, though he is in Randolph Co. Georgia in the 1850 census. Wm. Henry told family members that his father had been sterile, and that the biological father was a neighbor, whose last name was Raley or Grayley. This information was left out of Mayme Tyner's 1981 book about the Tyners. She was too embarrassed. In 2009 I was asked to do some DNA testing for the Tyner Project, and lo and behold , my y DNA does not match any other Tyners... but does match a Benjamin Raley (Raley-256) who lived nearby in 1850, and whose sister lived in the same household with Wm Henry Tyner's grandparents at the time, along with her 4 children under the age of 4. She eventually married Wm. Henry's mother's brother, who was probably the father of those 4 children. Benjamin Raley was quite a parental type.... he fathered at least 20 children with 4 different women, and sued in court to get custody of a couple of them, saying that the mother was a "loose woman". Bit of a double standard there! If it had not been for the DNA, I probably would never have found this ancestor and all of these cousins, brought to me by a "black sheep".

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I am not responsible for any of the great deeds my ancestors did no matter how proud I may be of being related to them.  Likewise I am not responsible for any 'misdeeds'.  I have a few black sheep and they add 'texture' to the tree. I try to see their crimes in the light of the times and accept them as they are.  No hiding.

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Хто ми, щоб судити?

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Роман --

Google Translate says that in English that becomes "Who Are We to Judge." Does that sound right??

Definitely a unique concept for a name!!

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Celebrate, Black Sheep are the best! Especially if they made the newspaper.

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That certainly makes things easier and helps to put a bit of 'flesh on the bones' so to speak.

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Well, I too have added one Black Sheep so far.  But I'm about to add more. Only fellow genealogists will know what I'm talking about, you come across something and you go hmmm, lets dig on this.  Well, after digging, I thought hmmmm, maybe I should do some history reading (again.)  So I got this book called the Feuds of Eastern KY, and at the same time, I"m trying to help someone find their biological family lines.  There was a line I hadn't developed yet and go figure, once I started working on it, that's were her line looks to come in.   The thing is, there an numerous black sheep in the line, and rather than put Black Sheep on it, I'm wondering, could we have a Gun Slinger or Fuedest tag.  A whole family of black sheep makes a flock!!!!  And funny, people are putting down that so and so was a judge or sheriff, or so and so was acquitted.  But that doesn't mean they were stand up citizens!   Back in the day, you didn't get private votes and everyone showed up to vote with guns in hand!  So imagine how the judge and sheriff got their positions!  Wild West??? Wild Kentucky!!! Who knew!

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Ahh, I found in a directory in the early 20th century, Indiana, a daughter who had down as a profession "stripper." With her address posted.   And it named the company she worked for, which I looked up and found that he did have dance halls.   She never seemed to have married, but she did take care of her sibs and mother and not long later, she's listed in a different, normal profession.  I suspect, with such openness and her family living with her, she had some great moral support from her family.  No hiding it.  But I was quite surprised to see it listed that way!

Answer 1

"Black Sheep" may be in the eye of the beholder.  My grandfather worked as a water boy when they were building the original roads in some very mountainous areas of WV.  I am sure they were rough, tough men doing their job and influencing a young 9 year old water boy.  My grandfather then went to work in the coal mines at the age of 13.  It was, at that time, a very dangerous, hard job....again, working with rough, tough men.  The results was that he was a rough, tough man.  He was living in the same area and same time as the Hatfield and McCoy mountain feud. I have no doubt, he kept their moon shine business profitable.  My mom wrote poems about her dad and how much he loved her and she loved him and all the good things he did.  She also wrote about his love a good fight.  He was  rough, tough man with a heart of gold.  You can not judge a book by it's cover. 

Answer 2

I AM the black sheep in my family (and proud of it!).

Answer 3

I would love to find a black sheep.  There is always more information on them and the digging is fun.

Answer 4

Finding a lunatic ancestor is what got me interested in genealogy.  When I was in high school my dad wanted to find out more about his family and we started digging into the family tree and found out his gg-grandfather was a soldier of the Revolution and came home to Maine and, most likely, suffered from PTSD or schizophrenia.   He started having divine visions... the Lord came down to him and told him to make a burnt offering and a sacrifice.  So, for his burnt offering he burnt down the Episcopal church in Gardiner, Maine (he was a Congregationalist) and for his sacrifice he murdered a woman who had illegitimate children.  He was obviously crazy so they locked him up in the jail in Augusta where he stayed for over 30 years until he died.  Finding this story I thought: "This is cool... I wonder what else I can find!" So, 45 years along in this genealogy business I still get excited when I find "black sheep"... they make the story so much more interesting!  But, I must admit some folks are not so thrilled to find such people lurking in their family tree.  I can remember my dad and I visiting my father's elderly cousin (she graduated from Colby College in 1915... we're talkin' old) and telling her the story of Crazy Henry... she stiffened up and said: "You found out about him, did you!"  She knew all about him... a family secret and a family shame, as far as she was concerned, 150 years after his death.  So, don't shy away from the "black sheep", let them be your motivator to find out more family stories... Happy Hunting!  Oh, to read Henry's story you can go to his profile at McCausland-173

Answer 5

We have some intersting/varied 'black sheep' in our family. One of those is Eliphalet Huntington, brother of Samuel Huntington who was one of the signers of the Declaration of Independence.Eliphalet is best known in his CT community as 'intemperate' which meant he was shunned by the church and held in low regard by community members. The down side is that when researching this ancestor I find very little whereas when researching Samuel & other family members there is no small amount of info.

As for slaveholders in the family - there are many. Most of them came to America in the 1600s & 1700s. Seemed to be the 'thing to do' if income allowed. After getting my au & mt DNA done, I discovered that there is African DNA that entered the gene pool between late 1600s early 1800s. Freaking out my children; not me. I do want to know more about the ancestors & circumstances that brought this DNA inclusion about. Before this time, there were only Caucasian Euros/Scandanavians in said pool. Time to go down the rabbit hole. :-)

Comments

My father told me, when he thought he was dying, about his illegitimate son.  I was too shocked to write down names, dates, or locations, so the information is not in the tree.  If I knew, though, I'd put his name in the tree.

I have an uncle who was imprisoned for rape (according to family history) and I will not put that information in WikiTree.  He was also involved with organized crime and that will not go in WikiTree, either.

My brother [[berntson-20]] was an alcoholic and killed himself.  That information is in the tree.  I see no reason to hide it.  

My grandmother was abused by my grandfather, ran away, and remarried without getting a divorce.  While in hiding, she renamed her children.  I'm including the marriage dates where I have documentation and the aliases of her children where I know them.  

Independently of WikiTree, I'm writing about family history for those members of our family who have had our history hidden from them.  I'm also including the good news, too.

Answer 6

I treat them the same as all ancestors, presenting all that I have found and documenting where I found all the information.

Answer 7

I have slave-owners on one side of the family and voyageurs on the other. All are simply presented in my family tree, no discrimination.

As far as black sheep og, I think I am probably that ... although I call myself the red sheep. ::grin::

Answer 8

I haven't decided what to do in my case.  Everyone is supposed to have good memories about Grandpas but both of mine were black sheep that have indirectly influenced my life for the worse.  One grandfather apparently suffocated his first grandchild and we accidently found out about it.  He is the same one who, on finding out I was a girl, declared "It's too bad she wasn't a dog so he could take me out and shoot me"  like he had just done to avoid paying for a license.  My mother tells horrible stories about how she and her sisters were treated by a stepfather because of the antics of her father having caused a divorce and her mother remarrying.

Answer 9

I have a child molester.  He was also a man of the cloth.  Guess how I portray him?  Hear no evil...print no evil...

Answer 10

I try to document whatever found by presenting it with no intent to be offensive in hope of finding more leads and a clearer picture.  I assume we are in it for similar reasons.  We enjoy the journey and that of our ancestors.  I like some of the guesswork and look forward to see how it unfolds. I want to know them all and the facts behind the facts.  I worry too many brick walls are there because of the desire to cover unpleasant truths.

Answer 11

L'histoire c'est l'histoire. On a pas à jugeretrouver, on y était pas et on ne connaît pas tous les éléments.  Ce n'est pas un ancêtre qui peut ternir toute une famille! CA lui appartient et n'à rien à voir avec le reste de la famille. Moi je crois que chaque anecdote est un trésor de l'histoire et que c'est ces vécut qui ont fait évoluer la famille toute entière dans ce qu'elle est devenue aujourd'hui. Mais où trouvez vous tous ces détails!
Donnez-Moi des pistes pour que je mette des couleurs dans ma propre histoire!
Suzanne

Answer 12

I have found black sheep in my family. I present them in as understanding a way as possible, given varied circumstances. The slave owners were not seen as black sheep by their contemporaries, so I tell the truths as best I can, and leave it. They were too far back to upset immediate descendants. I gave no quarter to Joseph Pozzi  a watch thief who stole repeatedly even though his father, brothers and cousins were all in the watchmaking business. He hurt his own family, but again immediate descendants were not living, so if they kept him secret, I let it out.

The third case is different. The living daughter of a mistress insists her mother was married to a man for whom I have proof that his first wife was his legal spouse and was living. The daughter is sure I have made a horrid mistake, which I will not broadcast, but will keep for posterity. Was the husband or second wife a black sheep? Both probably at the time, though standards on that are pretty flexible today.

Answer 13

I celebrate the diversity and eccentrics!

Answer 14

If I find something out of the ordinary, I find out all I can and into the biography it goes. I have ancestors, relatives, and family associates that were slave owners (being in the American South from before the Revolution it's almost inevitable), murderers, murder victims, adulterers, what appear to be good, old-fashioned loose women and some just downright unpleasant people. As a fiction writer, I can appreciate the drama that some unseemly behavior creates, but am glad that my contemporary family seems to be relatively well-behaved. I think one of these days I may create a composite character and tell some fictionalized family history in the form of a novel.

Answer 15

It depends entirely on the type of black sheep, how long ago it was, and what, if anything, has ever been said about it in the family.

Case 1: I have a many-great aunt who was murdered by her husband (c. 1895): he brained her with a chamber pot. He then proceeded to walk to town, and in the morning was waiting for the sheriff to arrest him. It was reported in the local paper of the day, so there's no secret about it. I've added both my aunt & her husband to the Black Sheep project.

Case 2: I have a teenage cousin who committed suicide within the past 10 years. I have no intention of putting any of the details on WIkiTree, especially since all of his immediate family are still living. (I haven't made profiles for 99% of my living relatives, & don't intend to...)

I try to be sensitive to the family, but I have a hard time with completely burying facts that are part of the public record & more than, say, 50-75 years old. The more recent the incident, the more it requires some discretion and sensitivity. If the family story contradicts established facts (actual records), then I think I would enter a description of what the family believes, then document the facts.

Answer 16

Whatever it is, it is what the evidence shows.  It's not realistic to attribute current morals, ethics or social structures to what appears to have happened in the past.  No fan of revisionist history here, as it harms the efforts of future researchers.

Answer 17

I include them in the family tree with information on their transgression(s) as a note.  One relative was executed by firing squad because he killed someone during a cribbage game.  My Great Grandfather married my Great Grandmother under one name, and months later, they were using a different name.  I can find no birth record for him under his original name, but there is a death certificate under  his assumed name.  Family legend says he killed someone because they were beating a dog, he then moved out of state, married my Ggrandmother and changed his name.   Who knows if this is true --- I cannot prove or disprove this story.

Answer 18

When it comes to forebears of recent memory... well, forbearance may be the best watchword.

But for the more distant in time, even if their story may be distasteful, I'd rather tell it.  It's history, and I'd rather relate it as truthfully as I can.

We've known for some time, in my immediate family, that we're descended from the brutal and racist whaling captain Howes Norris of Martha's Vineyard -- nominally civilized on land, it seems, but murderous at sea; his story is told in historian Joan Druett's "In the Wake of Madness".  (It's conceivable, Druett implies, that the tale of Norris's last voyage and his murder by members of his crew may have reached the ears of Herman Melville, and had some influence on the creation of the character of Ahab.)  There is no comfort in tracing one's lineage back to someone like that.  But I see little to be gained by ignoring -- or worse, whitewashing -- the facts of his grotesque abuse of his crew... including the prolonged torment, and eventual death, inflicted by the captain on a steward who is thought to have been a runaway slave.

Genealogical research, and the creation of meaningful profiles from the best sources I can find, generally gives me joy.  I couldn't make that claim in the case of Howes Norris: it is literally disturbing to me to think that I carry the man's DNA.  (And there is, in addition, a sadness associated with knowing the tragic story of his wife Elwina, who died nine years after Howes in a bizarre incident when a lightning-bolt shot down the chimney of her house, into her livingroom; and that of a son who later died when his ship caught fire at sea: truly, a family that lived under some strange, dark cloud.)  But in my mind I hear Shakespeare's words, spoken by the dying Hamlet to Horatio: "Report me and my cause aright/To the unsatisfied."  That charge needs to be followed, I think, even when the "cause" may not be worthy, ennobling, or attractive.

Answer 19

Black sheep add colour and personality to a family. Maybe down the track, a descendant in a bad situation can use the life lessons?
We have a part of the family where there was a split and it frustrates the H*** out of us that some living members seem to know why that occurred (about 1900) but refuse to even talk about it. The family member was in his 40's and married his land ladies 16 year old daughter. We want to know if this was the issue or was there something else? One of the sons was thrown out of home aged 12. Give us the answers, warts and all any time.

Answer 20

It depends on each individual case. I try to be honest with the facts but don't go into detail.

Having said that, I am annoyed with my Gr Gr Grandfather, who although married, had a 'fling' & don't like how he treated these woman at all and wanted to write so! His first 'extra curricula child' was born 7 years after his marriage. He had 11 children with his wife over 20 years, while he had 7 with his Mistress. His wife died & he had 4 more children. Final count, 22. He did marry the other woman, but he 'did the right thing' by not marrying her until 6 years of 'widowerhood'. (Creep, Cad, Horrible man-I'm embarrassed to be his descendant :) ) So! I have found it very difficult just to be factual when writing his Biography, & I don't think I've been very successful in being unemotional about the cad. My sympathy for my Gr Gr Grandma is a bit obvious. I have been very factual in the other person's Bio because I understand that in those times women felt it safer with a man around!. They may not have known the other existed.

I have a profile of a woman who killed her (she thought) cheating husband, gave birth to her youngest while waiting execution, & was the last woman hung in Australia. Her baby boy died within 2 months of her death & her other 2 little ones had to be brought up by family. At first I didn't include the circumstances of her life & death but I eventually decided to tell it like it was. No emotion or dramatization. After all, she has become a Notable Person in Australian history because she was a cause for which the down trodden, mistreated & devalued women rose up & fought, for her freedom at best, or a reprieve from hanging at worst. The result was that no woman was executed in Australia since 1855. A Black Sheep maybe, but also a hero for Woman's values & rights. Even politicians got involved in her cause. So Yes! I decided to add the details! I would like to think her descendants are proud of Mary Ann (Guise) Brownlow. She even had a book written about her; romanticised & some poetic license used, but a good/sad read. "The hanging of Mary Ann." by Angela Badger.