Hi, Herb --
What you call "secret," we call confidential. I don't think it's ever appropriate to ask people to air their dirty laundry in public, and we strongly discourage people from airing their grievances about individuals in the open forum. I'm not sure why that would be appropriate. So, the process you're questioning protects the parties to a conflict and prevents public humiliation, which would benefit no one.
Most of the time when there is a conflict, it boils down to a misunderstanding of guidelines and policies. Sometimes, it's a person who is unable to operate in a collaborative fashion. To be honest, most MIRs stem from new members who haven't figured out how to use the website yet and they're grateful to have the assistance of a mentor.
Occasionally, we'll get an MIR from someone who doesn't like the way someone else is doing something and it turns out that the person who filed the MIR is the one with the misunderstanding. In these situations, we ask a mentor to contact the submitter of the MIR and work with them to explain how things work.
When a situation gets bad enough that it requires a person's account to be closed, they have the option of a Public Review. This means that the whole shebang is presented in G2G so that the community has an opportunity to see how things were handled and comment on it, but this only happens when the party involved in the conflict requests it.
Despite what you're feeling, I can promise you that problems are handled as fairly and equitably as humanly possible. Mediators look at both sides of the story, changes to the profiles in question via the change logs, and they review communications that have taken place between the parties to a conflict. Most of the time, this results in the conflict being resolved peaceably.
It's also important to know that discussions that occur about policy, site changes, etc., are held out here in G2G. I think you'd be very surprised to find that this just doesn't happen much amongst team members and leaders. If a discussion about policy starts amongst team members and leaders, Chris or another team member or leader will remind them to take it out here in G2G so that the community is able to read and comment.
I'm sorry that you don't feel that you can trust the way the site is operated. If there's been a situation that has caused you to feel that way, you are always welcome to contact the team at email@example.com, post about it in G2G, contact a leader that you know and trust, etc. If it's been a situation with an individual, then you should go through the Problems with Members process on the Help menu -- this applies to problems with leaders and team members, as well. We're all human and are just as capable of making mistakes as anyone else.
Given the nature of most sites on the internet, it's understandable that some people might find it hard to believe that things operate the way they do here. Open communities like this are few and far between, especially communities where members are expected and required to be courteous. Even more unusual is a site where the community is encouraged to help develop the rules and policies, but that's is, indeed, how things were designed to operate here.
I don't mean to sound all pollyanna-ish. I'm just trying to let you know that what you see is what you get here. G2G is where it's at. ;-)