feedback requested on my first "real" profile bio blurb

Question

Hello folks. Acting on feedback from Jack Day and Marion Poole, today I wrote this bio for my paternal grandmother, Betty Lou (Simson) Taylor:

https://www.wikitree.com/wiki/Simson-243

Can I get some feedback on editorial style and formatting policy issues, if any? 

For example: 

• Is it OK to list but not link primary sources? (If I need to link them, how do I do that?) 
• Is it OK to mention (in the bio) living relatives, when the site appears to automatically suppress the display of those profiles/relationships? See my aunt and dad, to be clear.
• More generally, is this -- my first attempt at a real written bio -- what we're looking for; or have I missed the mark in some way? 

I'd like to get calibrated before doing more work. Because I have a very large number of researched relatives (many hundreds) to input here, whom I don't see in the database already. And while I'd like to do right by them... and the site... I also don't want to do any more HTML-type formatting than needed, because it's tedious and slow.. but of course, this is a balancing act, because we need our profiles to be nice, tidy and useful to the world. 

Cheers

Comments

I'm not going to address the source issue, because I'm positive I'd "'get it wrong" .. but I like how you've written the bio.  It reads smoothly, and tells the story.  :)

I (personally) don't think it's a terrible thing to mention the still living, or we'd be in a lot of trouble just by talking about our still living parents and children etc.  I think the problem would arise if we were posting photographs and full bios of them (but I could be wrong on that, too .. as in, linking to their profiles might be a WT "no-no" (need someone better "up on" WT policy in that regard to speak)).

Answer 1

Your bio is very well written. It is better than any of mine for sure. The reader gets a sense of the actual woman, not just some dry facts. Your links to living people seem fine to me. It doesn't give away any information that could easily be used for identity theft or anything.

Sorry. I am quite the nit-picker. I think you could add links, if you like, to Enrico Fermi if he is on Wikitree, FERMILAB if something about it is online, and the Manhattan Project. This is very easy to do. I just use two windows or tabs, one being the profile in the editing format, then the other is something about the Manhattan Project. Just copy the url to your clipboard, place an open bracket [ in front of the "The Manhattan Project" in your bio, space, paste the url next to the bracket [ (you'll use your arrow key to back up a space so you are next to the bracket) then put a close bracket ] after Project. It will look like this:

[http://www.manhattanprojecthistory.com The Manhattan Project]

Then it will just look like this:

The Manhattan Project.

If you want, I can do one for your so you get the idea. Better yet, I'll point you to page already done.

Did I say I was a nit-picker? I don't really think your sources are sufficient. Policy here is to use inline citation, but at the least, you should include a link and where you found it. If you use FamilySearch for the census, it is very easy because they give you the source citation, just copy/paste.

Comments

Here is a profile to look at:

https://www.wikitree.com/wiki/Selvaggio-145

Here's one that shows a link included in the bio:

https://www.wikitree.com/wiki/Russell-19886

Answer 2

Good first profile. A few suggestions:

1 - You can create numbered lists, such as your list of children, by inserting the pound/hash symbol (#) before each item in the list. See Help: Recommended Tags for use of # and other formatting aids.

2 - Using in-line citations (ie footnotes rather than a sources list) is desirable because it allows you to show which of your sources supports a particular statements. See Help:Sources for how to do in-line citations.

3 - In your description of the source try to give enough detail so that someone trying to find the particular record you are citing will be able to find it - eg not just 

4 - If your source is available online, it is nice to provide a link to the source in addition to the full source description. Such as:

1940 Fenger High School (Chicago, IL) yearbook, p 12. [https://www.ancestry.com/interactive/1265/sid_2821_1940_0012?pid=449569783 Link to page at ancestry.com ($)].

Note that in a real profile the above link will just show up as Link to page at ancestry.com ($). The brackets and url create the link.

Answer 3

Dear Isaac,

   The information about Betty Lou (Simson-243) Taylor is great, especially for one who died so young.  With sources, it is important that someone else be able to find where you were looking. If you can find a census record on a free site like FamilySearch.org, you can enter that link. As an alternative, give as much of a citation as possible.  I have put a link in Dr. Richard R Taylor-53594 's profile; you can see the citation information there.

   It is probably best to leave out any references to living family members.  You can create profiles for them and include their information, but they should remain private.

   Since Betty Lou is deceased, you might want to open her profile so others can see more details.   Good work!  -NGP