Mark Spalding BA,MEd,MA

Ancestors

Problems/Questions Profile managers: Amanda Lane [send private message] and Chris Spalding [send private message]

Mark Spalding BA,MEd,MA was a wonderful member of our WikiTree community who has passed away. Mark Spalding BA,MEd,MA made many contributions and will be missed.

Autobiography

1936 My father, Christopher Spalding,was born in Salisbury, Rhodesia,on November 18th.

1937 My mother, Rosemary Shepherd, was born in Gatooma, on November 1st.

1960 I was born in Harare, Zimbabwe (then Salisbury, Southern Rhodesia),on March 13th.

1962 My sister Mandy was born on June 3rd.

1966 Attended Belvedere Junior School. My best friend was William Simonides.

1967 Attended Widdicombe Junior School.

1968 My brother Gary was born on June 27th.

1973 Attended Cranborne Boys' High School.

1976 Wrote "O" Levels and did poorly in French. My best friend at the time was George Augusto Santiago dos Neves.

1977 Attended the Institute of Languages for extra French lessons, which I hated. Re-wrote "O" Level French in June and earned an "A." Joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormon Church)on August 13th. Went on holiday to Greece. Wrote "M" Levels in November.

1978 Attended Churchill Boys' High School where I took my "A" Levels in November.

1979 Served in the Ministry of Internal Affairs for a year. Was posted first to Nyamatikiti, and then to Chimanda.

1980 Attended Brigham Young University in Provo, Utah, United States of America. Went home for the summer and met Brian Le Clair on the flight back--he boarded the plane at St. Louis.

1983 Graduated from BYU with a Bachelor's degree in English and French teaching. Served a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in the California, Fresno Mission.

1985 Taught briefly at Bothashof School, in Southerton, Harare, Zimbabwe.

1986 Returned to BYU. Married Barbara Sue Mink in the Salt Lake Temple on August 16th. We spent the night at the Roberts Hotel, then went to Bear Lake for our honeymoon. My mother's words were prophetic: "Marry in haste, my boy, repent at leisure." Served an administrative internship at the Dixie Medical Center in St. George, Utah.

1987 Graduated from BYU with an M.Ed. in Educational Leadership. The emphasis was on Community Education.

1988 Returned to teach at Bothashof (now Eaglesvale College).

1989 Returned to Provo, Utah, late in the year.

1990 Moved to Glendale, California, where we lived on Tamerlane Drive, just off Verdugo. Began teaching at Dorothy Vena Johnson Opportunity School on February 6th.

1992 Visited France. Barbara decided not to go at the last minute. My parents and Brian joined me there.

1993 Barbara moved out in February after watching "Thelma and Louise." Met Diego Vargas. Got a kitten and named her Nkosikas.

1994 Moved to Pasadena, California, where I rented a townhouse. Met David Jarquin.

1995 Divorced Barbara Sue Mink on December 21st. Met Father Juan Carlos Diaz Flores and Daniel Ly. Visited Mexicali with Juan Carlos and a group of seminarians.

1996 Graduated from the University of California at Santa Barbara with a master's degree in French. Started teaching at Van Nuys Middle School. Purchased a condominium in Pasadena on Oak Knoll Avenue. Met Sister Benilda and joined the RCIA progam at St. Dominic's. Learned in December that my divorce had been granted the year prior. Brian and I went out and celebrated the first anniversary! Met Tom Lin. Met Betty Nelson.

1997 Nkosikas gave birth to four kittens. I kept two and named them Sabi and Mafuta. Joined the Catholic Church on March 29th. Participated in the Easter Sacraments at St. Dominic's in Eaglerock. Became a US citizen in a giant ceremony held at the Staples Center in Los Angeles. Met Kit Kittayabarn.

2001 Was driving to work when it was announced that the Twin Towers had been attacked on September 11th. Had my marriage annulled, as I was interested in entering the Dominican Order.

2002 Met Roberto Lovo.

2003 Resigned from Van Nuys Middle School and moved to North Manchester, Indiana, where I bought a house. Worked for both Manchester College and Indiana University-Purdue University, Fort Wayne (IPFW), as adjunct faculty. I had wonderful neighbours: Kirby and Sabine Thomas and their daughter Hannah.

2004 Taught for a year at Warsaw Community High School in Warsaw, Indiana. I resigned at the end of the school year and returned to teaching college. Met Caleb Vogel.

2008 Started teaching French part-time for Ivy Tech Community College, Fort Wayne. Worked in the computer lab at Ivy Tech. Met Mary Ann Stanley.

2009 Met Jim Duly. Started working part-time for the Center for Academic Excellence at Ivy Tech. Met Marsha Hisner. I was also teaching at IPFW's extension college in Warsaw and re-met Caleb Vogel.

2010 Met Tera Archbold and Sister Mary Ann Fox. Nkosikas died, followed soon after by Sabi and Mafuta. It was my "annus horribilis."

2011 In August I was taken on full-time by Ivy Tech Community College, Fort Wayne, as a tutor for the Center for Academic Excellence. I became good friends with Sister Mary Ann Fox, a Catholic nun who is a full-time English tutor for the CAE. Also met and became friends with Joseph Dorko, a student in my Introduction to College Writing course.

2012 Adopted a cat in January and named it Ariel after the character in Shakespeare's "The Tempest." Was diagnosed with stage three rectal cancer on March 7th. I underwent radiation and chemotherapy, followed by surgery on July 3rd. My parents, who were in the midst of moving to England, stayed with me from late June until early September. During surgery it was discovered that the cancer had metastasized. Two spots were removed from my liver, and my cancer was upgraded to stage four. This entailed further chemotherapy which ended on November 29. If 2010 was an "annus horribilis," 2012 was worse. However, I was touched by the way family, friends, relatives and co-workers rallied to my support.

2013 On January 11th I had a CT scan. A week later the doctor told me that there no longer appeared to be any cancer in my system. The residual effects of chemotherapy remained with me in the form of numbness or pins-and-needles in the hands and feet. Became close friends with Mahir Almandil.

In May my oncologist, Dr. Matthew Carr, said he wouldn't need to see me for three months. On August 1st I had blood work done, and on August 12th I met with the doctor. My carcinoembryonic antigen (CEA) levels had risen from the normal range (4.0 - 7.0) to 16. I had a PET scan on August 15th and met with the doctor again on the 16th. He believed there were tumors on the liver. On the 19th I had another MRI,and on the 29th met with Dr. Donald Reed, a liver specialist. He phoned me a week later and scheduled surgery for Friday, October 13th (my lucky day). There were apparently three tumors in the liver, and the plan was to remove the right lobe of the liver and to resection a portion of the left.

My sister, Mandy, who had just recently been granted a green card, flew in from Utah to be with me through my recovery.

Unfortunately, the surgery could not be completed as planned. Upon examination, it was clear that the cancer had metastasized to the abdomen wall and that liver surgery would be of no real benefit. One tumor was removed.

On September 23rd I met with Doctor Carr, who told me that my only recourse now is chemotherapy. He believes that, untreated, I would live for no more than a year, whereas with chemotherapy I can expect to live another two to five years.

I resumed chemotherapy on October 13th, 2013.

2014 On January 4th, 2014, my friend Mahir Almandil came to stay with me, with the intention of helping me through this round of chemotherapy. His presence here has been a godsend.

On March 13th, 2014, Dr. Carr's Nurse Practitioner, Carrie Boots, informed me that my Carcinoembryonic Antigen (CEA) level was back in the normal range. Normal is 3.2 - 7.2. In September last year it was 188 but has been dropping steadily since. The reading was taken two weeks ago and was 6.7. The Nurse said that this shows that the chemo has been effective and that after a PET scan they might consider reducing the frequency of the chemo, which would be a blessing.

As things turned out, chemo resumed as usual, with treatments continuing every other Wednesday. However, the side-effects became increasingly irksome. Frequent diarrhea resulted in dehydration, and so the doctor decided to give me a bit of a break from chemo. Also, since my port was swollen and red, I was treated with an antibiotic (amoxicillin). Happily, during this period of feeling relatively well, there was a family reunion at Mandy's house in Lindon, Utah, and on June 14th I flew to Salt Lake City to join everyone. Not only did I get to know my nephews, but I saw the entire family in one place at one time.

During my trip I looked up Christian Asplund, whom I had not seen since I was 24, at which time he would have been twenty. It was good to see him again; he is an assistant professor of music and has an office in the Harris Fine Arts Center.

Because my port remained infected, I had only one chemotherapy treatment in July.

On July 26th, Sister Mary Ann Fox returned to the Mother House at St. Mary of the Woods, in Terre Haute, Indiana. I shall miss her presence here in Fort Wayne. She has been a remarkable friend.

On August 7th my port was surgically removed by Dr. John F. Csicsko. The procedure was performed at St. Joseph's Hospital in Fort Wayne, Indiana. The wound remains open, since to stitch it shut might result in continued infection. It had to be packed, and it is my responsibility to pack it twice daily with a long, thin ribbon soaked in saline solution. It is not a task I enjoy.

On August 12th a temporary port was installed above my clavicle. The procedure required a local anaesthetic, so I was conscious throughout. A small tent was erected around my head, so that I saw nothing of what was going on.

Eventually my wound healed and the pick line was removed and a new port installed. This was a relief, because I had to flush the pick line twice a day, and a port is little to no trouble for me.

2015. I taught French on Tuesday and Thursday evenings during the spring semester, which was something of a trial for me. I taught on Thursdays wearing a chemo pump and found myself easily exhausted, though the students seemed not to notice and soon called out to remind me if I left the pump on the table. I received good reviews both from students and observing faculty, so I was pleased. It made me feel that I was not incapable after all.

Mahir Almandil moved back in with me at the beginning of the Fall semester. It was good to have someone else in the house.

Gary came to visit me during the fall, to work on some repairs in my house. He arrived on the same day that the McIlwaines, owners of the Java Cottage in North Webster, held a benefit for me. They raised $2, 275.00 to send me to visit my parents in December. It was good having Gary visit.

On November 18th I had my fiftieth treatment of FOLFIRI. During the 47th treatment Dr. Carr, responding to my request for time off from chemo in December, told me that he was glad I was initiating the break. He said that he was surprised that I had reached treatment 47 and that he was hard pressed to explain how I still had hair follicles, let alone the fact that my cancer and red blood levels remain normal, or that I am still working. He said that most patients with carcinoma cancer stop responding to treatment somewhere between the twelfth and twenty-fourth treatment, and that he had frankly expected that I'd be under palliative care by now. This rather shocked me and I didn't quite know how to deal with it. I went home feeling somewhat depressed, realizing that the cancer could indeed overwhelm me anytime. I wrote a poem about the experience, followed up a day later with a brief reflection. These can be found at http://maspalding.livejournal.com/690.html ("FOLFIRI x 47") and http://maspalding.livejournal.com/10804.html ("Hail Mary, Full of Grace").

Sources

• https://www.mckeemortuary.com/obituary/Mark-Spalding