The biggest thing I notice is that only two of his thirteen children are linked as children on his profile. You mention the others, but they aren't attached. There are also 34 sources on his FamilySearch.org profile, so you may want to check those as well.
There are a few little things, like, you refer to the ship Phantom several times, sometimes in quotes, and other times not. In English, ships' names' are italicized as I just did. It's the same whenever you mention the book The History of Brooklyn too. You probably want to add a comma after "lost right in the harbor" although you also don't need the word "right" in that sentence. Going further down, I believe the phrase should be "lost with all hands on board." No hyphen is needed anywhere, though "on board" should be two words as a prepositional phrase. You may want to change the comma after "talent for music" to a hyphen. After "1831" you may wish to put either a comma or a semicolon. There also should probably be either a comma or a semicolon after "age of 61."
The death date for Charles is given in a different format than all other dates mentioned.
I made this profile a source on Charles' FamilySearch profile and added his FamilySearch ID number to this profile for you. Good luck!
